Network Solutions Loses A Customer

Well, well, Network Solutions, way to lose a customer of six years.

You see, this domain was going to expire on July the 19th. That means that anyone of you guys, or any person with a wallet and a whim could purchase this domain. Now, considering our online reputations are so important, blah blah, I of course wanted to keep this domain.

Now, before I go on, let me rewind to last year. Specifically, July 7th 2005.

“Hello, Network Solutions.”

“Hi, I want to transfer my domain name but can’t figure out why I can’t unlock it. WTF?”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” he says. The classic ‘but I’m about to give you an offer so I can keep you as a customer’ setup line. “Why are you transferring the domain?”

“I am not going to pay you $25 a year when I can pay GoDaddy eight bucks to do the same thing.”

“Oh, I see you’ve used us for a long time. What would you say if I matched that price?”

“I’d say I wouldn’t have to transfer the domain.”

And so he did. Now, a year later, we begin this conversation again:

“Hello, Network Solutions.”

“Hi, I wanted to renew my domain name. I want to know if you’ll match GoDaddy’s price like you did last year.”

The guy on the other end takes a moment as he looks up my account. “Well,” he says, “the best I can do is give you $19.99 a year, minimum five year agreement, but you’ll get one year free.”

Oh, one year free! Woo!

“Haha, no, seriously, that’s the best you can do? Didn’t I renew for eight bucks last year?”

“I’m sorry, all we can offer is blah blah blah” I don’t recall the rest because I stopped listening.

“But that’s horrible, why would I do that?”

“I’m sorry, all we can blah blah blah.”

“Nevermind, thanks.”

Click. Congratulations NetSol, you lost money. Well done GoDaddy, for being affordable!

Can't take them out, can't take them out with baby artillery.
Can't take them, can't take them out, lady, it's secretarial.