Mysterious Ailments

When I was a kid, I got a wart on my hand. That wart pestered me almost my entire adolescent life. I would pick at it, rub on it, even try and cut it off with fingernail clippers—sometimes with bloody results. I was sick and tired of that damned growth on my palm.

Then one day I stopped noticing. The next time I went to check for it, it was gone. Another annoyance bites the dust. How many minutes, hours, and days had I been bothered by that thing? When did it leave? Why wasn’t I paying attention?

For a more recent example, over the past six to twelve months, I’ve had this sore spot on my gums. Being the studious guy who hasn’t been to the dentist since he was, oh, twenty, I head out to see him.

I could then get into a long story about how he not only found nothing but we were forced to pay for his services from our own pocket and get reimbursed, but I’ll move along for the sake of time and sanity.

Anyway, so he has no idea what it is or may be, and my teeth are in surprisingly decent shape. I do get around to brushing them every day, which is nice.

So I have this sore and it’s bothering me. This ‘bump’ on my gums hurts whenever something is pressing on my face, so when I get a hug from my children I’m instantly reminded of this strange problem.

After awhile of feeling of this bump, it begins to feel sort of like a zit. Like I know there’s pus in there—and you want it out, right?

So I press on it. POP it goes off in my mouth.

This is about the time you say, “Son of a bitch, that is nasty dude!”

Yes, yes it is.

The problem is, after I figure out the last year of my life has been bothered off-and-on with Mouth-Zit-Itis, it keeps coming back. It will reseal, recreate the pus, and will be popped again in a day or two. It certainly feels like it’s shrinking, and it seems I’m making progress, but who knows what would happen if I just left it alone?

I can’t find a damn thing about what this may be either. Anything in your mouth that is sore is instantly labeled Canker (great name) and beyond that you’ll need professional help beyond what you stumble on in Wikipedia.

So if you have one of those weird, strange ailments that bugs the piss out of you, don’t worry—we all do, and we’re all tormented.

And yes, a little grossed out. Damn.

I don't wanna be old and sleep alone
An empty house is not a home