Dear Future Self

This is the email I’ve written myself at FutureMe dot org:

Hey Evan,

How goes it. This email is dated for September 24th, 2010. You just turned 30. Congratulations. Your daughter(s) (and possible other children) are many years older. Annie should be well on her way to 3rd grade (can you believe it?), and Abby should be heading for first grade. If we have any more kids, I hope it’s a boy because that’s what I was hoping for. But we both know how wonderful girls can be, so be thankful.

As I write this, you’re overweight and you’ve got things that you can solve. Primarily financial, but we won’t get into that here. Let me tell you a few things you should have done by now (in no particular order):

– Lost 50+ lbs
– Designed a game by yourself
– Given your wonderful wife a nice long day/week/year off
– Moved into a house
– Created World Peace

Okay, just kidding on that last one. But if there’s something that should happen within 5 years of this email, it’s find a piece of land with four walls and a roof to call your own. You’ve always wanted a house, and that is your own little american dream. It’s not exciting, but do all dreams have to be exciting in the media-driven sense?

Of course weight is an issue, it’s always been one. The “back fat”, the clothes fitting irregularly, the embarassing wheezing or sweating, the whole bit about being big is not fun. You and I would both rather be skinny and tall, any day of the week. Maybe you’re closer to that goal. If you’ve achieved it, you have officially passed my expectations.

For one reason or another, you’ve probably not given your wife what she’s deserved. Sure you’ve been through christmases and birthdays but those don’t really cut it. You need to repay her for the almost decade of loyalty and great times. I’d hate to call it service, because of the negative conotations, but she needs to be recognized. Let’s just say this should’ve happened multiple times, because she’s worth it.

Lastly I hope you’ve taken the plunge and made a game of your own. Even if it sucked, at least you made it. If you never gave it to anyone (which I doubt you ego-maniac you), feel free to distribute it amongst your friends, family, and online…again. If you haven’t made it, what are you waiting for? You’re just that much closer to dying and you don’t want that horrible feeling of “What Might’ve Been” hanging over you. Currently you’re mired in development of Star Chamber (remember that game?) and are working on The Atok Incident set along with the new client. It was a great time, and your first experience in true development with a studio and a team.

As for jobs, I’m guessing you’re still at the same old place, hamming it up with Ed and Pansy and all of them. They’re great peeps. But if you’ve moved on for whatever reason, I hope you know how good you had it.

As I speak, you spend $3 a gallon on gas, a little more for a gallon of milk, and as usual your car is a piece of shit (the 98 Oldsmobile Bravada). However, the story behind the car and the Car Dealership Problems related to it are probably still hanging around, romanticized after years of telling that same old story.

I wonder where our friends are? Jeremy’s son should be in school, Chris Mellard should be on his way to…something, EJ and Dustin may still be mired in Warhammer 40K geekiness. It’s a crapshoot with those guys. But I’m sure Magic The Gathering is still around, and you may still play it, even on a Pro level. I know how badly we wanted to get on the Pro Tour gravy train, but the effort to get there may have been too great. With a family that dream is almost undoable, unlikely at best. I just hope you didn’t sacrifice any of your precious family time chasing dreams that didn’t really need chasing.

I guess I’m writing this now for a few reasons: One, it makes a killer blog post. (Are you still blogging?) Two, I have this morbid idea that you’ll die off before reaching 30. If you haven’t, congratulations. If you have, this email and whoever reads it will hopefully remember you fondly. That’s what we all want, right? Remembering a person and living beyond your years is the dream. Only the greats can last that long. Only the people who truly make a difference.

I hope that in 5 years you’ve made a difference. And that in those 5 years, you’re just beginning, and not settling for whatever was handed to you along the way.

Keep those kids tucked in, give the wife a long kiss, and good luck in the future. We’re doing just fine in the past.

– Evan

Don’t dethrone the drama queen
Just for putting everybody in their place