Worst. Day. Ever
There have been a lot of bad days in my life. When I got in accidents, when I was dumped by a girlfriend, when I got my wisdom teeth removed. I've lost jobs, totaled cars, wrecked relationships of all kinds, and still, still, it doesn't compare to last Saturday.
This was, unequivocably, the worst day of my life. Why? Well, let's start at the beginning:
After a week off the web, I was very excited to go to a big Magic tournament happening in Louisville. Ericka had procured some used tires for our old worn out set (Red Herring #1), and just before we left for Pigeon Forge we had to get one of those tired replaced due to the belt inside it snapping (RH #2).
So off we go, three of my friends (EJ, Dustin, and Chris) and me. I noticed that the front passenger tire was indicating signs of Structual Weakness (ie, it felt as if the band was snapping on that one as well), but I passed it off as an acceptable hazard, something to be replaced when we got back.
The tournament itself featured a grand prize of $2,000 cash for the winner and a box of old, expensive, unopened packs. I was very happy with my deck of choice and certain that at least one of us, based on skill level alone, would make it to the top 8. There were no prizes for 9th place and below.
So an hour into the trip, the car was vibrating like a dog shitting peach seeds. I took a cautious look behind me, wondering if anyone else noticed the elephant in the room.
Then the front passenger tire exploded.
I hate to say "popped" because there was still tread remaining. No, instead, the tread flew off, knocking off a huge plastic molded piece off the car, and quickly curtailing any plans of arriving early. We had left at 6:30AM, and the tournament began at 11AM. We should've made it in 3 hours or less. Now time was precious.
We go to loosen the lugnuts and two of them are much tougher than the others. Though I wasn't quite sure at the time, I now know what was wrong: They were cross-threaded.
SNAP! Came the first rod as we sheared the lugnut clean off.
SNAP! Came the second rod as we sheared the second lugnut clean off. Sigh.
If there is anything I'm most proud of, it's how we kept our cool and got the tire changed quickly. We were back on the road in twenty, twenty-five minutes tops, and very happy to still be under the wire in terms of cutoff time for the beginning of the tournament.
About an hour later, just outside Lexington, KY, we felt another tire vibrating in the The Band Is Going To Snap And This Time You Could Really Die fashion. I counted ourselves lucky on the first one, and we all agreed to take no chances on this one. We pulled off into the exit and searched for a tire store.
At this point it was about 10:15AM. If there had been no bad tires at this point, we would've just made it in time to the tournament. We consoled ourselves with the idea that the last time we attended a tournament up there, the event began late and we would have plenty of time to sign up.
The tire store was finally located and we fabricated a wedding we had to go to (I mean, let's face it, no one's going to go any extra miles to get geeks going to a CCG tournament). The man was unphased, saying it would take 45 minutes at least. Then we offered to take the tire off for them, so all they would need to do was replace and balance it. He said it would take 10 minutes.
Score, we thought. We were back on the road in 20 minutes, something of a World Record in terms of tire replacement.
An hour out, it was just after 11AM. We fretted at our time and hoped we would make it in.
At 12:04, we arrived at the Kentucky Fair and Expo Center. It was then we finally copped up to the bad news: The front driver's side tire had popped a belt.
For the folks counting at home, this means that each and every used tire we purchased was defective. We had the rear passenger side replaced for this problem, we had to change the front passenger side with a spare, we stopped in Lexington for the rear driver's side tire, and now this one was bad.
It didn't matter, we bounced and hobbled our way into the Expo center. Please, I pleaded with fate, Please let us make it in time.
And of course, the damned thing started at 11AM sharp. If we wanted to, we could take a 1 round loss and enter the tournament beginning round 2.
We would have to win each and every match to even have a shot at Top 8. We decided to take the chance. We had a long road of shit up there, we'd be damned if we just tucked tail and ran when we had a shot. Even a long shot is worth taking, if you fought hard enough for it.
So we hand over $100 ($25 each) to the organizer and anxiously await the Round 2 pairings.
Then my heart falls into my stomach. I was to play EJ round 2. An x-2 record would knock you out of Top 8 contention. One of us had just wasted $25.
Of all the players, of all the pairings, of all the luck. "That's how it goes," the organizer smiled, "you drive hundreds of miles and you still get paired against one another."
I wanted to hurt him. Badly. But nothing could prepare me for the despair I felt after losing to EJ in round 2 and realizing I'd have to spend another $60 for another tire. And that's just what we had to do.
After two more rounds, both Chris, EJ, and Dustin had lost a match. This meant no Top 8 appearance, no money, no prizes, no nothing. The entire day was not only a loss, it was a massive loss, a patient not-recoverable loss, like an amputated limb: It was beyond repair, it was beyond mourning, it just sat there waiting to die.
We drove home. It was the longest 3.5 hours of my life. Realizing that I had spent almost $200 to do nothing but suffer, and if life is suffering (something I truly believe), then we got a big plate of life on that day.
Today I had to call into work to take care of the tire situation and take Annie to the doctor. Apparently some strange virus is making its way through the Erwin household leaving fever in its wake. Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse.
I'd like to think of myself as an optimist. When I tell this story people ask me why I didn't turn back. Turn back? I repeat. What are you talking about? It never even passed through my mind turning back. We were making that tournament. I was good enough to win. So were my friends. If we had to face off in Round 4 or 5, that's fine. But to begin the day, your first game after all of those tribulations, to put another friend out and leave them hanging there, with busted tires and a soul worn out from the battles of the day.
There are worse things that could've happened. All things considered, we were probably very lucky. But when I go back and reconsider what happened, I don't feel very lucky at all.
This was, unequivocably, the worst day of my life. Why? Well, let's start at the beginning:
After a week off the web, I was very excited to go to a big Magic tournament happening in Louisville. Ericka had procured some used tires for our old worn out set (Red Herring #1), and just before we left for Pigeon Forge we had to get one of those tired replaced due to the belt inside it snapping (RH #2).
So off we go, three of my friends (EJ, Dustin, and Chris) and me. I noticed that the front passenger tire was indicating signs of Structual Weakness (ie, it felt as if the band was snapping on that one as well), but I passed it off as an acceptable hazard, something to be replaced when we got back.
The tournament itself featured a grand prize of $2,000 cash for the winner and a box of old, expensive, unopened packs. I was very happy with my deck of choice and certain that at least one of us, based on skill level alone, would make it to the top 8. There were no prizes for 9th place and below.
So an hour into the trip, the car was vibrating like a dog shitting peach seeds. I took a cautious look behind me, wondering if anyone else noticed the elephant in the room.
Then the front passenger tire exploded.
I hate to say "popped" because there was still tread remaining. No, instead, the tread flew off, knocking off a huge plastic molded piece off the car, and quickly curtailing any plans of arriving early. We had left at 6:30AM, and the tournament began at 11AM. We should've made it in 3 hours or less. Now time was precious.
We go to loosen the lugnuts and two of them are much tougher than the others. Though I wasn't quite sure at the time, I now know what was wrong: They were cross-threaded.
SNAP! Came the first rod as we sheared the lugnut clean off.
SNAP! Came the second rod as we sheared the second lugnut clean off. Sigh.
If there is anything I'm most proud of, it's how we kept our cool and got the tire changed quickly. We were back on the road in twenty, twenty-five minutes tops, and very happy to still be under the wire in terms of cutoff time for the beginning of the tournament.
About an hour later, just outside Lexington, KY, we felt another tire vibrating in the The Band Is Going To Snap And This Time You Could Really Die fashion. I counted ourselves lucky on the first one, and we all agreed to take no chances on this one. We pulled off into the exit and searched for a tire store.
At this point it was about 10:15AM. If there had been no bad tires at this point, we would've just made it in time to the tournament. We consoled ourselves with the idea that the last time we attended a tournament up there, the event began late and we would have plenty of time to sign up.
The tire store was finally located and we fabricated a wedding we had to go to (I mean, let's face it, no one's going to go any extra miles to get geeks going to a CCG tournament). The man was unphased, saying it would take 45 minutes at least. Then we offered to take the tire off for them, so all they would need to do was replace and balance it. He said it would take 10 minutes.
Score, we thought. We were back on the road in 20 minutes, something of a World Record in terms of tire replacement.
An hour out, it was just after 11AM. We fretted at our time and hoped we would make it in.
At 12:04, we arrived at the Kentucky Fair and Expo Center. It was then we finally copped up to the bad news: The front driver's side tire had popped a belt.
For the folks counting at home, this means that each and every used tire we purchased was defective. We had the rear passenger side replaced for this problem, we had to change the front passenger side with a spare, we stopped in Lexington for the rear driver's side tire, and now this one was bad.
It didn't matter, we bounced and hobbled our way into the Expo center. Please, I pleaded with fate, Please let us make it in time.
And of course, the damned thing started at 11AM sharp. If we wanted to, we could take a 1 round loss and enter the tournament beginning round 2.
We would have to win each and every match to even have a shot at Top 8. We decided to take the chance. We had a long road of shit up there, we'd be damned if we just tucked tail and ran when we had a shot. Even a long shot is worth taking, if you fought hard enough for it.
So we hand over $100 ($25 each) to the organizer and anxiously await the Round 2 pairings.
Then my heart falls into my stomach. I was to play EJ round 2. An x-2 record would knock you out of Top 8 contention. One of us had just wasted $25.
Of all the players, of all the pairings, of all the luck. "That's how it goes," the organizer smiled, "you drive hundreds of miles and you still get paired against one another."
I wanted to hurt him. Badly. But nothing could prepare me for the despair I felt after losing to EJ in round 2 and realizing I'd have to spend another $60 for another tire. And that's just what we had to do.
After two more rounds, both Chris, EJ, and Dustin had lost a match. This meant no Top 8 appearance, no money, no prizes, no nothing. The entire day was not only a loss, it was a massive loss, a patient not-recoverable loss, like an amputated limb: It was beyond repair, it was beyond mourning, it just sat there waiting to die.
We drove home. It was the longest 3.5 hours of my life. Realizing that I had spent almost $200 to do nothing but suffer, and if life is suffering (something I truly believe), then we got a big plate of life on that day.
Today I had to call into work to take care of the tire situation and take Annie to the doctor. Apparently some strange virus is making its way through the Erwin household leaving fever in its wake. Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse.
I'd like to think of myself as an optimist. When I tell this story people ask me why I didn't turn back. Turn back? I repeat. What are you talking about? It never even passed through my mind turning back. We were making that tournament. I was good enough to win. So were my friends. If we had to face off in Round 4 or 5, that's fine. But to begin the day, your first game after all of those tribulations, to put another friend out and leave them hanging there, with busted tires and a soul worn out from the battles of the day.
There are worse things that could've happened. All things considered, we were probably very lucky. But when I go back and reconsider what happened, I don't feel very lucky at all.
I'm on a roll, I'm on a roll this time
I feel my luck could change
I feel my luck could change
2 Comments:
I'm relieved to hear you're ok and made it back safe. Bruised and bludgeoned, maybe. But safe.
:-/
I just can't imagine how that could be worse than getting dumped.
;)
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