Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith Review

Last night I attended a midnight showing of Episode III. How was it? Well, in the immortal words of Snoop Dogg, “It ‘twas the shizzle.” Finally, finally, finally Lucas got it right! Ye geeks who haven’t yet seen it, breath a sigh of relief. The world is right again, the film is fabulous.

And what does right mean? Right means no more than 20 seconds of Jar-Jar, who never says a word in the movie. Mmm, mmm. Right means that there are decapitations, ridiculous lightsaber battles, and amazing space destruction as far as the eye can see. Right means that the story of how Anakin became Darth is not only poignant but affecting as well.

This is one down-beat movie. Don’t think for second it ain’t all going to hell, because it is and you get to see the slow transformation from man into monster via Hayden Christensen. I’d also like to say the acting here borders on ridiculously wooden and bad at times, but that They Did The Best They Could. Let’s just say it’s not half as bad as The Phantom Menace was, and to be grateful for it.

Oh, and the “Romance” scenes were some of the worst, most cringe-inducing cinema ever introduced on a silver screen. There’s more intimacy to be found in a dentist visit. Seriously, I heard groans from across the theater. Thankfully these are limited to 2–3 minutes tops, and we move on to more shit blowing up.

When The Phantom Menace was released, I went ape-shite over it for a few days, then realized it was crap the next morning. With Attack of the Clones, I reserved my opinion for a day or so and let it sink in: I’m still not convinced it’s a terrible film, just flawed. It’s a little slow and too political for my taste. But for Revenge, Lucas gives everyone a high five and says, “You know what? Let’s just blow shit up and kill people.” And that’s exactly what happens.

There are times during the film where you’ll be pulling for Anakin not to be Darth Vader, and that to me is Lucas’ greatest achievement: He made you feel sympathy for Vader. Tough in any circumstance, though they really push the “I was misled” (subliminal Stand reference y’all) angle, which helps out quite a bit.

Overall I’d say its by far the best of the prequels and is only bested by The Empire Strikes Back, the other “dark” Star Wars film. Space opera is always a tricky beast, but this one is excellent. Buy some popcorn, invite some friends along, and let the movie do the talking. I can’t wait for the DVD.

Were you ever kind, were you always cruel?
Who’s ever seen that side of you?

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